I sit in my classroom and slowly run my eyes over the pictures, posters, books, desks, bulletin boards, cabinets, white boards. I am anticipating the arrival of my students and notice the clock counting down--T-minus 20 minutes. I'm in a reflective mood--especially today. Today, Mikey interviews for a full-time job with the city. Today, we will probably hear from our realtor, updating us on the status of our offer on that house (or at least, we hope!). Today is Monday and the beginning of a new week; coincidentally the last week of September. Today, I struggle to put away my doubts and fears, stop my leg's nervous bouncing up-and-down, and dwell in these moments. 15 minutes left.
For the past two years, we have been avoiding a full-time job for Mikey. Funny how that works, seeing as how we would like to start having kids and I would very much like to stay at home with said kids if that were to happen. But we haven't felt right about it. There's always been something better on the horizon--something that called for more simple but fulfilling living. The last "clear message from God" we had in the career area was for Mikey to stay part-time and spend his off-time hanging out with college kids. Now, since God sent us to Africa...and then sent us back to America...the college kid thing isn't in the picture and we are left pondering if there is any reason that Mikey is still part-time. I feel like I'm still hanging on to that last message for dear life. "This is what God said to us! I know what we're supposed to be doing!" But we aren't finding that that is relevant anymore and now these options are available that we were avoiding before. I am circulating through my mind that last Africa-thought before we got on a plane to return: live in the NEXT thing...God will open and shut doors as he pleases....you don't have to know what's next....10 minutes.
Okay: here's what's next that you can pray for...
*We put an offer on a house...our first-ever offer! We are really excited about this house and are already dreaming about where to put things and how it will effect our hosting-life-style. I am seeking to enjoy those dreams with open hands, so that if God has something better for us, he won't have to wrench it away from me
*Mikey has a job interview with the city today; pray for peace over Mikey during the interview, and peace for us afterwards whether he gets it or not.
*We are full into the swing of life here, which for us often means spending the majority of our off-work time with other people; please pray that we would not stop pursuing one another and become simply co-habitators. I am feeling disconnected from Mikey at times and want us to connect over more than just logistics.
*I am doing a (required, I'm sorry to say) devotional in front of our high school body on Wednesday and I am getting nauseas anytime I think about it; I'll be sharing a bit about Africa and want it to be relevant, understood, and communicated clearly. Gosh, I am so nervous!
I guess I'm more inclined to write when I'm struggling, eh? I will try to write on more joyous occasions! Thanks for listening to the good, the bad and the ugly.
Love,
Laura
We are praying, Laura. And thank you for sharing your heart for Africa. We are in the process of adopting from Ethiopia, and we know that our world is going to change the moment we step off that plane to pick up our child. God is awesome like that though, and there is just nothing that can truly prepare us....
ReplyDeleteI read this one entry of yours about 7 times since this afternoon.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this. I needed it.